Ha! How D'ya Like That!

You Are An ESTP

The Doer You are adventurous and risk taking. You act first, think second. You love being the center of attention. Chances are you were the class clown. Competitive, charming, and charasmatic - you have your own code of honor. You live a flexible lifce, bouncing between a series of activies that interest you. You would make a great salesperson, marketing director, or entrepreneur.

What's Your Personality Type?

For the record... My official title is; Regional Director Of Marketing
How d'ya like them apples!

Get A Load Of This Shit!

I've copy/pasted the last few posts from the asshole's blog for you all to see.

It fucking amazes me the shit that he writes about me. Especially since he's the one who needs a full body lift. The fucking old windbag!


*edit*

I decided against reposting his shit verbatim. There's no need to publicize his vomitous spew. Suffice to say, he's spending all his energy writing about how wrinkled I am, how grey my hair is, how terrible I sing, and how boyish my ass is.

All this from a bald headed, paunch bellied, broke ass, Greaseball Wop prick who has to cut 6 inches off the legs of his 38W x 29L discount jeans.

When I first met him, he was wearing a raggedy-ass sweater that looked old enough to vote, and blue jeans that came half way up his (decidedly undersized)calves. He had a cheap $4.00 haircut which, when you considered the number of hairs left on his head, was too expensive.

In the years I ran around with him, all the hundreds of dinners, vacations, day trips, etc., he never ONCE reached into his pocket. Never ONCE picked up a single tab. I paid for clothes, jewelry, tattoos, lobster dinners, digital cameras, ... you name it.

Unbelievable! This loser fuckwad, (who is old enough to be my father btw) is writing incessantly about how old and ugly I am.

I'd love to unload a double dose of Sybil's patented Razor Tongue on him, but then I'd have to admit to him that I'm reading his spew, and I can't bear to give him the satisfaction of knowing that he's frosting my ass.

He needs to die.

Gonna Do Somethin' Crazy

Visiting here and reading me frequently, (with the exception of Stellina, who knows me in person,) do you get a sense of who I am and what I'm like? Do you get a feel for my level of common sense?

Do you think I'm level-headed, or do you think I'm impulsive, and impetuous?

Well, whatever you think, I've made up my mind to do something completely out of character, and possibly quite crazy.

I'm jumping on a plane, headed to Florida to visit someone I've never met.

Don't try to talk me out of it. I'm going.

Remember negative optimism? .....

I know it's crazy, but at least it's risky!

In This Morning's Health & Fitness Online.....

Muffin Top: Excess belly fat that puffs out. Usually seen on women wearing, low-rise jeans and short shirts
Cankles: When there is no distinction between the calf and the ankle
Doughnut: The fat that lies around a woman’s navel (and the belly button makes up the hole!)
Wings: The bulge formed around the bra pushing excess fat above and below the fastening strap
Buffalo Hump: Upper back fat
Banana Fold: Excess fat below the butt
Chubb: Kneecap fat


Um.... weren't all these terms first heard on Seinfeld?

I've Got A Dupree

A new term in today's vernacular: Dupree - An unwanted, no end in sight, houseguest.

My brother is here. And when I say he sits around the house, I mean he really sits around the house.

He sleeps until 1-2pm every day. He eats more than a plague of locusts. He is only now getting the idea that I won't tolerate him not showering (now if I could only get him to change his clothes daily!) He commandeers my television. He snoops in my personal things. But more than any of that, what annoys me the most is, he's perfectly content to just sit in that chair (when he's not in bed) and never EVER move. He just sits there, and channel surfs.

What am I going to do? I can't stand having him here!!!!

Jos Asks "Why?"

Jos asks why am I unhappy (see meme below.)

Here is my answer Jos. And by the way, thank you for asking.

I am unhappy because I can't seem to fall out of love with a person who is poison, and who won't remove himself from my realm long enough for me to get over him.

I'm unhappy because I've had to open my home to my brother whom I simply cannot live in harmony with.

I'm unhappy because I spend most of my free time alone.

I'm unhappy because most of my unhappiness is beyond my control.

I just figure I'm going through a very low astral cycle, and I keep waking up each morning and hoping that will be the day it's finally behind me.

One Word Meme

Taken from Sassywife:

Y O U … C A N … O N L Y … T Y P E … O N E … W O R D !

N O … E X P L A N A T I O N S !

1. Yourself: Resourceful

2. Your boyfriend/girlfriend: Not

3. Your hair? Curly

4. Your mother? Dead

5. Your Father? Dead

6. Your Favorite item?

7. Your dream last night: none

8. Your Favorite drink: Pepsi

9. Your Dream Car: Z4

10. The Room You Are In: Den

11. Your Ex: Friendly

12. Your fear: Spiders

13. Where do you want to be in 10 years: Retired

14. Who you hung out with yesterday? brother

15. What You’re Not: mean

16. Your Best Friend: none

17. One of Your Wish List Items: flatscreen

18. What makes you happy: peace

19. The Last Thing You Did: pee

20. What You Are Wearing: shorts

21. Your Favorite Weather: warm

22. Your Favorite book: horror

23. The Last Thing You Ate: sandwich

24. Your Life: unhappy

25. Your Mood: stable

27. What are you thinking about right now: this

28. Your Crush: none

29. What are you doing at the moment: this

30. Your summer schedule: busy

Boy, I can't believe how the days are just flying by! They said this happens once you pass 40; I am here to say, 'It's true!'

Well... what's been going on... let's see.

Tomorrow my brother arrives back from California. Broke, and homeless. Guess who gets to put his smelly ass up? Right. Me. Feel sorry for me because it's going to be ugly around here until he gets a job and his own place again. We don't meld well. It's something about me having to constantly nag a 52 year old man to take a shower and clean up after himself. *sigh* I'm not looking forward to this WHATSOEVER.

I've been out a few times with H lately. I keep trying to feel that something ... that spark. So far, nothing. But I'm not giving up. I figure I'm still dealing with Dickhead fallout so I'll keep giving H the benefit of the doubt. He really dotes on me, and he's such a genuinely nice person. We'll see.

Spent all of last weekend out riding my motorcycle. On Sunday I ended up at the Blue Lantern singing karaoke with a bunch of long haired old Harley hippies and it was SUCH a hoot. I had a great time.

Tuesday I got caught in that horrifying Boston traffic as a result of the equally horrifying Boston tunnel fatality. Speaking of which, how absolutely terrible is that? To tell you the truth, I have never ever felt comfortable traveling through those Boston Big Dig tunnels. I've always felt it was just a matter of time before something like this happened. Holy shit.... the traffic in and out of Boston is nothing short of Hell on earth. It sucks big green donkey dicks.

Dickhead is on an upswing with his hovering and stalking. Isn't it too bad that now he knows he isn't dying, and so he wants to move back in? HELLO!!! Do I look stupid? Nah... he's got a better shot at winning Powerball.

Still DJ'g on Friday nights. Only thing is, I quit spending that money at the casinos. I want a big-ass LCD HD flatscreen. So, I have to stop blowing all the disposable cash at those Devil places. No.More.Gambling.

Well.... like I said, tomorrow the brother arrives. That means tonight is the last night for awhile that I'll have any privacy..... so if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go sit on my couch naked - BECAUSE I CAN!

Shamelessly Stolen Meme

This was stolen from my friend who doesn't want to be linked. "S"

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?
Oy, I'm getting old!


2. How much cash do you have on you?
$176.72

3. What's a word that rhymes with "DOOR?"
Score


4. Favorite planet?
Uranus (heehee..... yes, it still makes me laugh)


5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone?
Dickhead. (Every missed call is from Dickhead. What does that say?)


6. What is your favorite ring on your phone?
The old fashioned ring that sounds like my Gram's rotary dial phone did.


7. What shirt are you wearing?
Black Ralph Lauren Polo T-Shirt

8. Do you "label" yourself?
Yes


9. Name the brand of your shoes you're currently wearing?
Nike

10. Bright or Dark Room?
Depends; Bright if I'm reading or working. Dark if I'm sleeping.


11. What do you think about the person who took this survey before you?
She's bright, funny, thoughtful... and she reminds me of a young me.

13. What were you doing at midnight last night?
Watching Discovery Health Channel. I'm hooked on that damn channel.

14. What did your last text message you received on your cell say?
I'll be there today at 1pm (From the cleaning woman)


15. Where is your nearest 7-11?
1 block north, and 2 blocks west.

16. What's a word that you say a lot?
Whatever


17.Who told you he/she loved you last?
Dickhead (and no... I didn't reciprocate)



18. Last furry thing you touched?
Can't remember the last time I touched anything furry.


19. How many drugs have you done in the last three days?
None

20. How many rolls of film do you need developed?
None


21. Favorite age you have been so far?
40



22. Your worst enemy?
Hahahaaaaaaaaha... Dragon Lady, the eyesore.


23. What is your current desktop picture?
Tribute to the Twin Towers (it's really a nice picture)

24. What was the last thing you said to someone?
Ride safe (A dude pulled up beside me on a Sportster and were talked bikes)

25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly what would it be?
A million $$$$$$ No Question

26. Do you like someone?
Not really


27. The last song you listened to?
Don't Fear The Reaper - Blue Oyster Cult

Yikes!

I wonder how this goofy little online quiz hit my nail right on the head?

Sybil took the free ColorQuiz.com personality test! "Longs for a tender and sympathetic bond and for a ..." Click here to read the rest of the results.

Dirty Rotten Mother F*'g No Good Rat Bastard!!!

Let me tell you all a story so ludicrous, it defies rational thinking!

Years ago, before Dickhead, I was involved with a human of the male species - (I won't call him a man, as that would be too complimentary.)

As that relationship begin to disintegrate, (for many reasons, none of which mine!) Dickhead and I met. I knew almost immediately that the party of the first part needed to go, and the party of the second part was my companion of choice. Ok... so we all know how it turned out with the party of the second part, but that's not what this story is about.

Anyway, I dumped asshole #1. At first I tried to be kind and gentle, but as is so often the case, he wouldn't allow me to let him down easy. So after much begging, pleading, name-calling, and threats (on his part) he finally took the hint and hit the bricks.

That was many years ago.

Now here we are today, and me with all this time on my hands, tend to surf blogs looking for something new and interesting which I might want to continue reading.

Lo and behold, whose blog do you think I come upon but Asshole #1's? At first I was like..."Oh this is cool. I can sort of be a Peeping Tom, and nobody's the wiser." But as I continued reading through the archives, I got the fucking shock of my life.

Now first let me say... I do not now, nor have I ever had an STD of any kind. NONE. Period! However, let's not cloud the issue with facts!

Apparently, Asshole #1 went and got himself infected with the gift that keeps on giving, long after we split up. So what does the fuckwad do? He blogs about it, AND says it got it from ME!

And he doesn't just blog it once, he blogs, and blogs, and blogs for weeks and months about it.

As I'm reading this, I'm seething. I'm so mad I can't see straight, and I'm grinding my teeth in a death clench.

So, I'm sitting there torn. Do I leave comments and go on record that the idiot is A) A fucking lying sack of shit, and B) Flirting with a defamation lawsuit? Do I copy/paste his blog entries on my blog, and out him by name, address, and photograph as a card carrying member of the H Society? Do I call some friends of questionable and dubious character, and have his motherfucking legs broken? Do I ignore it, keep monitoring it and wait for him to identify me by name or photo so that my lawyer will have something meaty to sink her barracuda teeth into?

I opted for the latter.

So here's my editorial on the subject:

When a relationship ends, 9 times out of 10, one party is aggrieved. One party is left with hurt feelings. I understand that hurt feelings and bitterness are difficult to contain. Believe me, I understand that. But WHY on earth resort to such dirty, underhanded tactics to exact revenge? To what end? I mean, suppose I had never happened upon that blog? It certainly was by strict coincidence that I found it. How would him posting those venomous lies have given him satisfaction had I never seen it?

What makes people stoop so low as to fabricate the most outrageous of lies just because another person chooses to travel a different road in life?

I'll tell you... total and complete lack of character. That piece of shit is amoral, and completely lacking the most basic of human attributes.

He is, without a doubt, beneath contempt.

Fuck Him!