Tell Me Whyyyyyyyy ???

Why oh WHY must the little old lady who is inevitably in front of me at every single cashier I ever go to, pay her tab with PRECISE change?

I mean, the bill is $7.97 - and she wants to empty her change purse of every bloody nickel and penny she's carrying around, AND it takes her for fucking EVER to count it. And the pennies keep coming, and coming, and they fall, and they roll, and she keeps pulling them out of every crevice in her purse!

WHY?

And why oh WHY must every octogenarian who still drives a car inevitably decide to pull out into traffic directly in front of me, causing me to jack up on the brakes, and then proceed to drive 15 miles per hour? WHY? Why couldn't they just wait another 2 seconds until I speed by, and then they can putt putt along to their heart's content!

Is it a conspiracy? Is there some greater order of old farts who meet in secret, and plot to fray my last nerve at every opportunity?

How did they come to single me out? What did I ever do to them?

I propose that A) All old ladies must use plastic when shopping, and B) Anyone over the age of 70 must have their depth perception tested before being allowed to drive.