Random Curses

Today I'm feeling particularly hateful. Mean, and hateful. So, to celebrate this wonderful mental state of mine, I'd like to brainstorm some unique and creative curses to bestow upon the subject(s) of my hatefulness. I thought I'd share them with you here. Feel free to borrow at will.

1. I hope you fall into a woodchipper.
2. I hope you become unable to control all of your bodily functions. In fact, I hope you crap your pants every time you open your mouth to speak.
3. I hope a Boeing 747 flies up your ass.
4. I hope your hair catches fire.
5. I hope a bus careens out of control, jumps two curbs, and nails your ass in the WalMart paking lot.
6. I hope your teeth rot, and your eyes cross.
7. I hope everywhere you go, dogs piss on your leg.
8. I hope you develop an uncontrollable drooling problem.
9. I hope you suddenly find yourself with overwhelming, incurable body odor.
10. I hope you become the villiage idiot.

................ oh wait...........
You already are the village idiot!